Mission: Market Share New York's ASPCA shows its true colors What has Orange done for you lately? New York City's ASPCA fired out a breathless "breaking news" alert last week and a letter from ASPCA President Ed Sayres. The ASPCA has long been a dominant animal law player in New York City, where all dogs and cats picked up stray, or impounded for any reason, must be surgically sterilized before they are returned to their owners. The ASPCA maintains a full-time dedicated lobbyist in Albany, too. But that was then, and this is now. The ASPCA has widened its horizons. Spread its wings. Got the bit between its teeth. Targeting four cities this year as, Mission: Orange, the ASPCA's million dollar PR campaign and re-branding effort, pledges to take the ASPCA coast-to-coast. Humaniac turf war? Looks like competition for "humane" donations just ratcheted up a notch. There'll be fierce competition for constituencies, too. Just how many national animal protection organizations does this country need, anyway? How are donors supposed to figure out where to send their money? While smaller than the Humane Society of the United States, the ASPCA reports revenue of about $50 million in 2004, and claims more than 1,000,000 members and supporters across the country. The ASPCA's tagline: "We are their voice" HSUS? "Promoting the protection of all animals" "Donate now!" is all over both websites, naturally. Decisions, decisions. Where to mail the check? This could get complicated! "We need you on our side" , also known as "Join now!" But the ASPCA doesn't mean me. I'm a dog owner, and the ASPCA doesn't support dog ownership. Or cat ownership. Gerbil or canary or turtle ownership. The ASPCA says guardianship is better. Their entire website was updated, not long ago, to reflect a global change to guardianship language. In other words, the ASPCA would like you to forfeit your ability to make decisions regarding the care and welfare of your pets, because you would no longer own them. And since the ASPCA is in the humane law enforcement business, guess who would be stepping in to make those decisions for you? Agent: Orange. Of course, of course. Orange will be backed up by the court system which has the power to appoint, and to remove, guardians. We are The Enemy. The Enemy is us. It used to be the hunters (bloodthirsty sociopaths). Then it was the breeders (money-grubbing puppymillers). Occasionally its the pit bull crowd (drug-dealing criminal losers). Now its all animal owners. So I'm the enemy. You probably are, too. We are characterized by the ASPCA as those who "have title to and dominion over the animal for the owner’s enjoyment and benefit as he/she sees fit." By definition, we're heartless monsters. Exploiters exerting our dominion as we see fit. Just ask the ASPCA. Selling shelter animals to pet shops. I thought that pet stores were on the humane movement's shit list. Remember the battle cry? "Don't buy from a store while dogs and cats wait in misery at the shelter!" I guess, anticipating that the pet supply chain will swing away from established sourcing, that had to change, too. Sha-zaam! Selling shelter animals to pet shops is now a good idea. But let's be clear: We're not talking consignment deals. Those puppies and kittens will be SOLD to pet stores. But, no worries! This is a good thing! The ASPCA says it is. Yup. All about market share. But I can see the angle. With a little coaching from pet retailers on bringing the product to market, those dogs and cats mean significantly increased revenues! Plus, think of what the sales would do for those "live exit" statistics the ASPCA is so concerned about. Hey, that dog or cat went out the door alive on its way the the pet store. Right? ASPCA and Agent Orange on the national platform Its not just the color scheme that's making me queasy, although the blunder seems to indicate an overall lack of judgement, if not a complete break with reality. What were Saatchi and Saatchi thinking? The ASPCA paid a million dollars for orange? By the way, do you think the ASPCA or their PR firm has any clue about who else might be using blaze orange? Any clue at all? This orange thing is so confusing! Just ticking along like Clockwork ORANGE The ASPCA opposes hunting under any circumstances, but uses blaze orange as their new symbol. The ASPCA "does not support purchasing or otherwise acquiring animals from large-scale commercial breeders [or] the retail outlets they supply. . ." but says that selling shelter animals to pet stores is okay. The ASPCA says owning animals is bad. Its exploitative. But then the ASPCA says there are problems with "guardianship", too. What kind of a whacked out outfit is this, anyway? I don't think they have a coherent position that differentiates them from HSUS. Not anymore, at least.

This is all about market share. The mission is market share. Not preventing cruelty, or any of the rest.